On birthdays

There are a lot of things better off written than me talking about it in front of people. A response given during the Vanguard August Birthday Fellowship, 23 August 2013.

Birthdays.

Why do celebrants take time to enjoy their birthday? Why do people even celebrate with you?

This composition may answer, but it would most likely describe how I recently look at birthdays.

Birthday celebrations differ based on several factors:

- Year or age

- Presence of family, friends

- Financial displacement

- Cultural and social conditions

- Etc.

The second point greatly influences how you celebrate during the younger years of your life. From a toddler and most likely until college, these are the people who take part in a 24-hour free man's time. This may be celebrated in Disneyland or just in your nearby mall. It may be you who's treating your friends to lunch, or your family giving a surprise party after you get home tired.

The YOU in birthdays come past your years of innocence and dependence.

Childhood is merely a celebration of the "success" of your parents in bringing you into this world. Even though they throw a party with their friends and all the relatives, it actually doesn't affect you. You're a baby, a kid or someone who gives more attention to the cake and toys - the simple things in life that give you joy. Visitors and guests just pass by the day.

When you grow up a little bit, you begin to recognize the presence of your family and friends. You yearn for their company on the day, even week, of your birth anniversary. This stage comes around high school to the early years of your work.

Then comes the cornerstone in these feasts. Once you grab a hold of your career and do something significant, the time for a birthday wherein you are the center subs in. The gifts and important people are still there, but the cameras are focused on you. It's your existence that make these days meaningful for you and for the people around you. This line may be acceptable during the longest part of my division of the birthday season ( childhood, teen-early adult, adult, death): "We're glad to have met you" or "We're glad to have you in the family". Something along those lines that means you've done something good for it to make an impact on lives. And, you wish for more years to come, more blessings to keep you up in whatever you keep yourself busy with. You wish that you could make more friends and help around and not be a tombstone just waiting to be placed over a grave. Yes, if you do not do anything with your life, you are good as dead - no more birthdays.

Finally, like the heroes and big names you see in markers of halls, roads, and material objects, your legacy will touch generations. Obviously, these are better acknowledge during the time of your birthday or death anniversary. Others will be celebrating that you, your ideas and your actions made lives meaningful.

I'm still young that the last two parts of this is pretty shady.

I celebrated my 21st birthday, but i don't remember how. It just passed by, and ran like a breeze due to the weather in the country. However, i did find ways to celebrate with the people that mattered. I rest at that day while waiting for the years. I'm quite eager to be remembered as a saint or as a good pet owner. Whatever works is fine with me.

atheneum

Sa minsang paggawa mo ng mga papel o pagsagot sa mga tanong sa internet, ang lumalabas na trabaho mo ay mag-aaral.

Maganda sigurong trabaho ang pag-aaral kung binibigyan ka ng sweldo, hindi baon, ng gobyerno o pribadong paaralan. Isipin mo yun, P456 kada araw. Pero, yung tuition fee at other expenses mo ay tax o kung ano ang mas angkop na tawag.

Ngayon, Agosto at huling semestro ko sa UP, sobrang daming ko nang oras ginugugol sa pag-aaral. Review, advance reading o pagwawasto sa mga tala, masyado na ang panahon para sa mga ito. Totoo pa rin ang sinasabi ng nakararami na paghahanda ang pag-aaral: sa buhay labas-silid, sa karir na nais mo pasukan at bilang isang mabuting mamayanan. Ugali ang hindi nailalagay sa curriculum, nabanggit ito sa isang pelikula. Parang ganito: "Education without character development is useless". Bagay ka lang kapag wala kang alam, bagay na walang buhay at walang silbi. Wala kang magiging dulot sa sarili, kapwa o bansa, at kahit ang pagkuha mo sa lugar (occupy space), ay hindi tatangapin na silbi.

Totoo na hindi mo dapat sayangin ang edukasyon, na katumbas sa panahon ngayon ay pera, oras, tiyaga, atbp. Sa mga taong hindi nakapagtapos o hindi nakadanas ng kahit na anong pag-aaral sa paaralan, maaring magsimula sa bahay. Dito, marahil unang sisipa ang paghubog ng iyong ugali. Sapat na iyon upang lumundag o talunin ang mga harang sa iyong pagkalap ng kaalamang makakatawid sayo. 

Dati malugod kong tinatanggap ang mga panahong walang pasok dahil sa bagyo o bakasyon (holiday), pero sayang ang panahon. Maaring mas marami ka pang matutunan, o siguradong maaga ang summer-sembreak mo. Siguro nalampasan ko na ang kababawan na ito, na may higit pang layunin kesa magrelax-relax. 

Lahat ng tao ay binabayaran dahil sa pag-aaral mo. Iba-ibang anyo at iba't ibang tama, mula sa pamilya mo, sarili at sa taong 'di mo kilala na nakatambay sa dulo ng Pilipinas. Minsan ang sweldo mo o sukli ng iyong pagtrabaho ay sapat na ring pantawid sa kalooban mo dulot ng paghihirap at ginhawa.

Hindi ko lang mapigilan ang sarili ko magbabad sa mga laro. Tulong. 

ETC

21st Birthday - I have to write this down because the arithmetic gets tricky.

I welcomed this rainy day while playing four games of HoN. Won the first game, lost the rest.

Took a nap, and had my initial plans of a solo-treat birthday set aside. Rain was terrible at other areas, and the way to the places i wanted to go were most likely flooded. So, pass.

This was part of the plan: down yung mcdelivery.ph at hotline.

3 pc hotcake, blueberry syrup. strawberry-oreo mcflurry. iced vanilla coffee.

Then I went home, and studied for most of the day. Took a nap again while reading my notes.

Went out with my family to eat dinner. The crew should have been bigger, but the weather made things terrible for my folks at Paranaque. 

Sa totoo lang, hindi ko na alam yung dapat maramdaman kapag may birthday. Dati mapapansin mo na excited ka pag, kahit papasok pa lang yung August. Katulad na rin ng ibang mga pangyayari sa buhay (Pasko, Birthday ng iba), medyo hindi mo na alam kung ano pa ang mga bago. Napaisip ako kanina kung ano na pakiramdam ng kaarawan makalipas ang limang taon, na kung saan maaring nagttrabaho na ako o basta nasa malayong lugar.

Masaya ako sa mga simpleng bagay, madaling makakuha ng ngiti sa mga ganun. Wala ako masyado hiningi sa araw na ito. Kahit nga pamasahe papuntang McDo, ako na yung sumagot. 

Mas masaya siguro yung araw na ito kung hindi binabagyo ang Pilipinas. Nakaikot na sana ako sa Manila, at walang napeperwisyong mga pinoy (habang sinusubukan mo magka-Happy Birthday). Okay na nakapagaral ako ngayon at nalinis ko yung combat boots at sahig. 

Ang pinaka-OK na regalo ko siguro ay nakasama ko yung magulang ko at kapatid ko mula Day Zero hanggang ngayong Day X. 

   /^\

\(o_o)/

  | d |

   / \

Photo post 1

My Gibson Size 10.5 Regular(?) Combat Boots. This is normal shine, but this pair was intended for field training exercises. So, how do you think my parade boots would fare? Hard work and a lot time! Skill din pala!

Cotton stainer mating near IB. This was the time where i had to take a picture of any insect and add a caption. It was suppose to be a part of our Bio 118 exhibit, which i miserably failed to achieve personal standards.

My Guinet Cap (Rayadillo Headgear) with a cotton stainer on the tip of the spike. Only failed me during my graduation parade. zz

Met this girl when I was a basic cadet, and had its presence at the complex until my final days in the Corps. I never saw her afterwards. When she was a kitten, she would be very aggressive-defensive whenever i wanted to pat her nose. She grew up to be more friendly, and i became more loving to this cat.

Bio 140 - Genetics Problem Set. Pedigree analysis of genes which are transferred to offspring, genes that are identical. We were getting the probability within incestuous families.

Along the Barracks Hallway during one cold night. Check out the frog! and my keys!

Inside the Barracks, mess area. Someone besides me was hungry at that time.

Bozanian Beastfigther Guild Logo. One of the best guilds in Phil. Ragnarok Online.

I quickly bought this when news came out of its appearance! Parang patak lang.

This what happens to flying dinosaurs when they enter our classroom during high school. Notice the sheet of graphing paper that was soaked in something wet, alcohol - number one killer for pests.

My table during my senior year in high school. Look at my beret! I probably had a presentation since there's an arnis stick. That's probably a Friday, when we usually have CAT.

On my second year for KLIK ( Klaseng Ibang Klase)/ACLE (Alternative Classroom Learning Experience - UP Version), we visited the ABS-CBN Building at Mother Ignacia.

Somebody's birthday. High school classmates went out for billiards and coffee.

The good old gaming days. I own the girl knight and male whitesmith. 

My high school ID, which i still have, can be seen with the October Medal. Both are my prized possessions. ID's change every year. Alternating orientation of portrait and landscape, and the faculty usually have the other one not used. The years also have different backgrounds: Freshmen Green, Sophomore Red, Junior Sky Blue, and Senior Ateneo/Royal Blue.  

Ateneo Pin given during Varsity Night or some recognition day for athlete's. I was part of the Taekwondo Club that competed in PAYA and PRADA games. Sadly, my mother didn't allow me to compete in UAAP. I would have lost, but the experience would be enough for a prize.

NISMED Kitchen

I forgot  my last meal in this canteen. It seems this kitchen went ahead of me, and a grumpy tummy makes me sad.

It's easy to find a place to eat in UP, and this fact remains true until your first semester. Or until you've already ate at each shack at least twice. So, it get's difficult to repress your hunger, or to find the right nutrition for your money. 

NISMED Canteen - Cervantes Kitchen and Catering Services

It was up as early as June 2009, my first month in the University of the Philippines. I don't remember my first dine-in in the said canteen, but my meal was probably for breakfast. I thought, "this place serves few food". I haven't realized then that food came in at time past 10:30 AM, but you could already see the upcoming dishes on their whiteboard. I frequently ate at the complex, located near Pavilion 1, after my Chem 31 classes. 

From fishballs to pancit canton, i indulged myself on very good food. The best in the university at the period. 

Meals were not that expensive, nor ration few in serving size. Price range is 40 - 65, with a real meal with vegetables or meat.

The place has it's own air conditioning system that's usually turned on when diners pack the place, or when 10:30 AM strikes. Ceiling fans do a great job at certain tables. Usually, cellphone signal is weak inside the dining room. 

My Favorite Meals (actually lahat)

1. Baked Chicken - Even if the leg part was on its 2nd day, it still tasted great! All you had to do was to ask for more of the chicken juices.

2. Tinola - One of my favorite Pinoy dishes, served well with hot soup!

3. Coffee Buns - So much heaven in such a small piece. It got phased out during my junior year, for some reason. I always buy at least two pieces, and scrape of the dressing left on the baking sheet. It got replaced by cupcakes that we're also fine. There was a time where I was able to eat coffee cupcakes with choco chips.

4. Kaldereta, Beef with Mushroom, Beef with Oyster Sauce

5. Blue Marlin/Fish with Lemon - A very simple dish that's very appealing to my taste bud. Acidity was just right, and i never have those mini-seafood allergy attacks. 

6. Baby Back Ribs, Chicken Longganisa

7. Chili - They had this homemade chili that was mixed with oil and probably small shrimp. At first, they offered it free with some meals that wen't well with a little spice. Soon they bottled it up, and began selling it at a fair price. I bought one, and finished it within two weeks!

Some of the items i wasn't able to try were the vegetables, pasta, desserts and drinks that didn't meet my interest. 

The servers are very kind and attentive. The only time they bring the food to your table is during breakfast, where they heat the food or whip up a part of your meal. Acceptable. They also have this quotes and proverbs unique at each table.

They also operate on a CLAY-GO system, but students sometimes do not help out. A wash area is located within the room, and clean drinking water is also provided, self-service is also observed when it comes to that. You also find one practice of getting your change. They don't put it on your hands, but they have a small plate where they drop your change. 

With the good points in mind, you don't need to wonder why the place is usually packed every lunch time. The thought that needs more than a meal's worth of pondering time is its replacement or departure. 

I'd accept if they left for some better place, but i'd never accept that the canteen was replaced by your average college canteen - that serves blah meals with blah service. I actually wish i pushed through with acquiring their services for my ROTC class' Ring Hop.

Great food, now gone.

bacterial nomina Latine

It's interesting to see some of their translations. A lot of which I don't know.

On Baranggay Emergency Rescue Team

Context of this post
1. Pure observations.
2. Very minimal to no research done at all

Some questions and points
1. WTF are these?
2. Why do I see them most of the time roaming the streets of the city, even if there are no apparent emergencies?
3. Why? I see some of these utility vehicles with your regular civilians. I'm not sure if they're government personnel, but they sure do not look like a team on its way to a disaster.
4. I've never heard of the actions of these BERTeams in the news, and i believe it has been in service for more than a year. Quezon City seems peaceful enough.
5. I think every baranggay has one. I hope this isn't a waste, or hasn't been a waste of tax payer's money.
6. These vehicles go beyond their area. Recent example: I saw a BERT Van of UP Campus going to either Quezon Ave or East Ave.
7. Mas mabuti siguro kung DERT, or by district para hindi sayang yung resources.

Nakikita ko sarili ko sa salamin

Eh yung bigla o dahan-dahang pagtingin sa iyo o sa katabi mo. Parang biglang nagkaroon ng limit sa pwede mong tignan. Kaya magpapasimple ka, magkukunwaring nakatingin sa kawalan o dadaplisan ang pwesto niya bago lumingon sa katabi. Mga teknik na kung may isa pang ikaw ay matatawa ka sa nakikita o nababasa mong galaw. Ito ang mga panahong bago ang pag-ibig, kasabay ng pagkaisip-bata at pagkakilig sa simpleng bagay.

Binabagalan mo umalis ng silid, para mas matagal mo siya pwedeng pagmasdan. Nagkataon na may kadaldalan pa siya sa pinto, sakto o sadya niya? You wish! Lalabas ka ng kwarto at medyo lilingun-lingon, pinag-iisipan mo kung saan ka pupunta, pero alam mo kung saan ang sunod na lakad mo. Alam mo din kung saan ang daan niya, pareho sa dadaanan mo. Malas mo at may klase ka pa, at hindi ka na makikipagtalo sa sarili mo. Maglalakad ka ng may angas at dating na nagsasabi: "Pansinin mo ako".

Hindi pa pala tapos. Bago ka makarating sa ibabang palapag, magkakaabot pa kayo ng tingin sa hagdan. Mag-p-pause ka ng konti at sasadyain mo na makita ka pa niya. Sabay, biglang lakad na baka sakali mabitin siya.

pusok

Hindi ako mapakali, at sa bawat tingin ko sa kawalan ay hindi nasusuklian. Nakikita ko ang pagkakataon, na sa kasalukuyan ay hindi maabot. Ito'y isang kalayaan sa likod ng malinaw na salamin, nakikita ngunit hindi naabot. Pagkahibang na maituturing kung ito'y aking kausapin at pakinggan.

Sa unang araw ng paglalayag mula sa Inang bayan, hindi pa kita naisip, at sa yugto na ito, halos araw-araw na. Kailangan ng isang maka-kalawakang yapak upang makarating ako sa buwan. Mga sinag lamang ng araw ang bumabati sa akin sa tuwing nawawala ang Venus.

Ang mga dahilan na sa iba'y malinaw at naayon sa tungkulin ay may 'di pagsisiwalat, subalit hindi maituturing na pananakip sa anumang bagay. Ito'y naging totoo, at sa panahon nang makakita ng salamin, katuwaan ang idinulot ng galing natin.

May mga panahong hindi inaasahan tulad ng minsang pagkain sa tabi ng mangga, kasama ang mga uwak at rehas ng daluyang tubig. Ang hatiang nauwi sa kabusugan ng buong loob. Minsang ding dinanas pasanin ang bigat ng aking dala, at sa pagkapagod mo'y akong sumalo.

Minamasid-masid ang kapaligiran at ang mga bagay na sinasabitan ng mga bagay na mala-amorseco. Mga bagay na kumakapit parang lamig at tuwalyang yari sa telang dulot ay pagkahimbing.

Habang iniisip ko ang mga ito, malalayo ang aking nararating. Sapat sa panahong ito.

I'm not running with you on your marathons

It's not good for an injured person to run for long distances.

/sigh

Upper body injuries very much prevent me from hitting the road.

So much to that worry, and it just makes me smile. And laugh. All at the same time.

and I've reached the end looking for something.
quite close.

On food deliveries

I really wonder why some food delivery services forget items, sometimes it's the main package. When I eat my food in their restaurants, I see store personnel, sometimes even the guard who checks the delivery bag. They have their order, receipt and change even before they leave the counter. So, why do they forget condiments, utensils, desserts and dishes?

The onset of fatigue shouldn't be a reason. It shouldn't be for a long time since personnel should be trained or at least management should take care of the services his store provides.

On being late, it's also a puzzle for me. When drivers get lost, most of them return to their restaurant, and the next thing we know is nothing. We have to call up the branch and follow-up, then it's the time they send the rider back outside. Such poor service.

I'm the customer who gives a generous tip despite the delivery charge, service charge or the profit that should be allotted to delivery. I give extra when they come before the time set, even when it's pouring outside.

I was fascinated when I ordered from Yoshinoya. I noticed there wasn't any motorcycle nearby, and i just inferred that he commuted. It may be that the delivery guy parked at the wrong street, asked the wrong house, and got directions to the right one.

..still, good job to those drivers who bring food whenever i'm too stuffed with laziness.

dahil sayo, napasulat ako

Parada at Parking

TOPIC: Ceremonial Parade

n. a military ceremony that involves the formation of a unit in the presence of its commanding officer, or distinguished guest, with the aim to check the condition and proficiency of the troops

also known to the public as: drills, marching under the sun, the infamous activity of ROTC, waste of time


At first, I was just indifferent to standing for hours or doing movements over and over. It may be because of my athletic upbringing, that I wanted to challenge myself more, or for the fact that it was part of the training. I had to find or feel its purpose and benefit if I wanted myself to find it a good activity.

I began to love parades and ceremonies when I was designated as platoon sergeant. My platoon leader then, entrusted to me a basic command - fall in. The two words, PULUTONG, HUMANAY!, brings everyone out of their rooms and into the field to form the unit. When everyone's aligned and positioned well, of course with my assistance as it is my task and responsibility, I report: "Ma'am, the platoon has been formed". An exchange of salutes take place, and I fall into place -just beside the first squad leader.

Then came the time of the Rayadillo.

I also enrolled in the cadet officer candidate course of that time. I was still taking my basic ROTC, and we were well into the preparation months for RAATI, the annual inspection of units. It is not a mystery why ROTC units spend a lot of time for the perfection of ceremonies. Pride, honor, fame, points, and awards. It should puzzle strangers nor the cadets who participate in such events. Ceremonial parades are the dances of the military world.

Cadet officers brag about being very proficient in execution of basic rifle and marching drills. They are the ones who lead the parade through a series of voice commands and movements. *kling-klang-flash-whoop* An eye catching performance of the unit will be seen, but not limited, in the following:

1. Voice commands that echo around the parade grounds
2. Synchronized lifting of rifles, and the *clang* when each cadet tap their rifles
3. No strings attached to perfectly aligned marching units
4. Fancy parade uniforms that sway with the wind, or crisp fatigues that show uniformity

It is a measure of everyone's ability to cope up with one another. Again, most of the burden fall onto the command of the officers. Cadets, and the junior officers know what to do already. It's the memory, the timing and the quick-thinking in the event that things fall apart that make cadet officers one of a kind.

It is also a means for classes of cadet officers to brag about their skill. It takes a decent amount of time to prepare yourself, your uniform and your men! I haven't mentioned some tasks that staff officers take in preparing the grounds and the operations of the ceremony. By my word, nothing beefs up the heart more than your unit, platoon or battalion, in tune to the drum's beat as you pass by the grandstand. Nothing.

Often, competition is high even during practices and rehearsals. Members of the classes are on their toes not to make mistakes, especially the upper classmen!

A really difficult part is to instill and inspire the cadets into going through this lesson in ROTC. Drills. Again. Drill. Again. It creates order and balance in a unit. It conditions cadets to be attentive to commands, and to respond properly. I was able to observe poor cadet attitude and performance when Drills and Ceremonies were incorporated at a later time. When I was a cadet, parades did not make much of our conversations, but it gave us activities to do during our tambay. Picking up rifles and doing the basics. Then, we end with some fancy spinning and tossing. It's with the person.

Gradually cadets are conditioned. It's an important part of their training, conditioning. They must be able to withstand the heat, the thirst and itch, the grasping sweaty uniforms and the nagging people behind you. If they experience the worst pain and largest stress, then only a few things would make them crumble when they're out. It's a silent lesson that cadets realize once they see they haven't reached the limit or the nightmare.

The Armed Forces of the Philippines during one of its ceremonies 

at General Headquarters, Camp General Emilio Aguinaldo.

Rayadillo Honor Guards in a Line formation. The ceremony is an arrival honors ceremony given to high ranking officials of the government and military, foreign dignitaries, VIPs and distinguished guests of events. It is part of the ROTC unit's duty to conduct such ceremonies.

As Honor Guard Commander of the Rayadillo Company 2012, during Bonifacio Day. In my class, I was the only one to hold such position. I was with my executive officer and classmate Sam Castro, and my guidon bearer - Cadet Alcain.

The UPROTC Symphonic Band in action! The band plays the usual marches and several lively pieces that suit the part of the parade. The few famous ones are Hot Stuff and Push On UP.

During the Turn-over of Command Ceremony 2013. Staff members nearest to the camera: Cadet Marteja, Cadet dela Cruz, Sam Castro (classmate), and Cadet Alcain (blocked from view).

Corps Executive Officer (the Ex-O) during Sound off. The band makes a round in front of the unit while playing a minute-long piece. The rest of the troops are in parade rest while the troop commander and staff do a unique version of the rest.

Sometimes we get to laugh at mistakes, and be proud of achievements. Wavy command voices, pagpiyok, sleepy heads bobbing during rehearsals, robotic marches and anything that's out of order. The terrain changes, the clouds move faster and the guests come in late. Parading elements stay in their positions as long as it is needed, and the officers, their role models, are always there. Most of the time, they're the stiffer ones. Things go automatic when command and music kick in. The next thing you know, it's all over and you're heading back to base.

It takes more than patience and steady, strong feet to finish a parade. Most end with a boodle fight or anything good enough to be chowed! 

Malayang mga bahagi

Isang buhos ng damdamin

Sa panahon ng Bio 118 (Entomology), isa sa mga nagmulat sa akin sa kagandahan ng kapaligiran. Isa mga tagong layunin ng BS Biology. Litrato mula kay Ms.Calayag.

Malapit-lapit na rin ang panahon na aalis ako sa UP. Tinaguriang isa sa mga pangalawang-bahay ko, at ngayo'y isa sa mga daan tungo sa isa pang pamamahay. Hindi ko alam kung mapabibilang pa ako sa kahit anong kurso sa UP Manila, pero sa panahon na ito wala pa akong makkwento para doon.

Isang kabadong umaga ang gumising sa akin nang malaman ko na 'di ako tanggap sa mga napili kong kurso (MBB at Bio). Masakit isipin, hindi pa ata lumalabas ang resulta ng ACET. Malaking kahihiyan ang halos 'di pagkatanggap sa paaralan na kinabilangan ng bawat kasapi ng aking pamilya. Ako lang ang maiiba.

Hindi ko din naman ginusto na ipagpatuloy ang pag-aaral sa Ateneo. Banggit ko nga: "Kapag pumasa sa pareho, sa UP nalang ako para apat na taon lang". Natatawa ako kasi iniwasan ko ang limang taon sa kolehiyo. All set na ako para sa UP kung pumasa.

May hatak rin na walang mag-UP sa aking klase sa highschool, mas gusto siyempre na kasama ang barkada sa bagong lilipatan. Naalala ko: Ang Diliman Boys, hango sa Alabang Boys na sikat sa balita noong mga araw na yon. Mga matatalik kong kaibigan na karamay ko sa tahaking Medisina, at may iba din ang hilig.

Ipinaubaya sa mga taong hindi kilala at naghintay ng pasya ng paaralan.

BREAK

Sa unang mga araw, hindi ako mapakali. Hindi ko alam kung paanoo kumilos sa lugar na ito, kasama ang bagong mga kamag-aral. Hindi naman ako nanibago sa mga kapwa babae, sa iba't ibang braket at ang kabuuan ng kulturang UP na hindi ko pa nadadaplisan. Alam ko lang ang mga mahahalagang lugar pag-aaral at kainan, pati na rin kung paano umuwi.

Unti-unti kong natuklasan ang ginahawa at hinagpis sa UP. Marami na ako naramdaman sa Ann Arbor at Ateneo, pero mag-iiba dapat ang lahat. Sa mga madadalas na mataas na marka sa pagsusulit, ngayon ay nagiging isang himala at palaisipan. Malalaman mo nalang na kailangan mo maghirap na 'di gaya ng dati, na halos mag-isa. Naihanda ko na ang sarili ko na magsumikap o tanggapin ang anumang ibabato sa akin ng unibersidad.

Isang kakapit sayo, at sa lahat ng mga estudyante sa UP: pagkamulat. May kaakibat man na galaw o mistulang apathetic trip ay ayos lang. Lahat mararanasan mo, mas buo mas makatotohanan at mas malakas ang bagsak sa iyo. Pasanin mo ang mga eksam na kung dumating ay dala-dalawa bawat araw sa buong linggo. Tiisin mo ang minsang trapik, mahabang pila, mga sistemang sa iyong paningin ay nalutas mo na at nagawan ng solusyon. Katalinuhan ng karamihan, diskarte ng mga magagaling, katangahan sa mga di inaasahan na lugar. Kalat, isyu, readings, kaibigan, pera at kahibangan.

Sa bawat akyat mo, madarama mo ang patuloy na tagumpay at 'di humihinahon na mga agos. Malulunod ka lang kung magpabaya ka, at walang handa na sumalo sayo. Hindi din naman bato ang mga taga-UP, marami ang may paki-alam sayo, subalit wag mo lang sila biguin ng sobra-sobra. Maiiwan at matatangay ng di mo namamalayan.

Ang kasiyahan sa UP makakamit sa sobrang daming paraan. Tuklasin mo dahil hindi makakahon ang paraan at ligayang ito.

Malaki ang dulot ng pagpapalaki sa akin Ateneo, tapatan pa ng paghuhulma para maging sandata, tulay o gabay, marami makakamit at malayo ang mararating ko. Kahit anong kumbinasyon, maraming tagumpay ang mapapadpad kung magsusumikap ka. Sa huling mga araw ko, tunay na nagsusumikap ako at nararamdaman ang pagkabusog. Lipad o bagsak, ito ang bumubuhay sa aking mga panaginip, nagbibigay lakas sa aking mga galaw at nagbibigay ng kahusayan sa pareho.

Four Cardinals

Another intersection spun by the wind

North - A Mariner's guide
Just another illusion on where to go when you're lost. When you get things right, without knowing anything, a star smiles back at you. Behind some clouds, you glimpse a shimmering reaction.

East - Mad at the cold
Where the sun rises first. The one that heats things up for the morning. Just before it turns too hot, the time tells you to stop by noon time.

West - You'll all dream of land
Where most look and follow. A source of entertainment on stage. It's better to follow that direction that to lead yourself in some dull way.

South - Krystal of the orient
All things go south. If you'be gone too, turn around and go back. Pass by all the rest and head home.

Fragments
look to the left, look up as it goes by, let it smile back, stay behind it, let it feel you, let it laugh with you
remember time as they move, be confused, go back and end together, enjoy
take advantage, be creative, on your toes, observe how they enjoy, connect, laugh as well
that and everything much more

Ang BIGKAS

Kasalanan ko at hindi ko matandaan ang lahat. Hindi ko naman nakalimutan ang lahat ng aking natutunan, pero ang pagkamit ng kahusayan ay nadaan sa mga ganitong pagsasanay sa Mataas na Paaralan ng Ateneo de Manila.

Bigkas, n.
- isang pagsasanay sa asignaturang Filipino, tumatagal ng humigit-kumulang na isang minuto, nagbibigay ng marka ang guro habang itinatanghal ang piyesa sa harap niya o buong klase
- mga linya binabasa o saulado, minsan biglaang pananalita
- buhat sa sariling gawa, gawa ng kaklase, hugot sa Noli Me Tangere at El Filiusterismo, at salin sa Tagalog ng mga linya ni Makbet at Hamlet

Nabubuo ang pagmamarka sa bawat estudyante sa pamamagitan ng

Lakas - Nararapat ba ang sigaw, bulong o antas ng iyong boses upang marinig ng bawat kasapi ng iyong klase, lalo na ang guro! Ika nga ng mga guro ng kagawaran: "Dapat malakas ang boses na maririnig ng lahat, pati na rin ang mga ayaw makinig, ang nagkukunwari at ang mga tulog!"

Ginhawa - Ipakita mo na hindi ka kinakabahan. Walang mga di kinakailangan na kilos-kamay o papalit-palit ng tayo. Natural  lang dapat, at naayon sa iyong tauhan. Madalas na binabawasan ka kapag binubulsa mo ang iyong kamay, inaayos ang polo, at nilalagay ang kamay sa likod. Saulado mo din dapat ang iyong sasabihin, bawal ang may kodigo! Bawal paputol-putol, o stuttering.

Kulay - Bawal ang robot! Kumbaga hindi ka lang dapat asul, maging maroon o ibang anyo ng asul!

Salita - Malinaw ang bawat pantig. Hindi nakakain ang mga patinig at katinig.

Talab - Ito siguro ang hinuhuli ng mga guro habang hinuhusgahan ang aming maliit na pagtatanghal. Kailangan mo mapagalaw ang mga tao, mapaiyak mo ang siga, mapaisip mo ang tamad at mapasang-ayon ang guro na bigyan ka ng A+.

Ang bigkas na 'di ko makakalimutan habambuhay ay nangyari noong unang taon ko, kay Ser Ron Capinding. Binibigkas ko ang tula ng kamag-aral, na piyesa sa aming sabayang pagbigkas para sa Palig 2005, o yung gawa ko mismo (na hindi nasama sa paligsahan). Binibigyan ng ikalawang pagkakataon ang mag-aaral kapag nakita na may igagaling pa. Sa 2nd try ko, biglang hinayaan ko ang sarili at bumitaw ng malayang pananalita. Parang nasa back seat ang aking mata at tenga, tila may ibang nagkontrol sa akin sa pagkakataon na yun.

May isa pa akong bigkas, noon nasa 4-I na ako. Inaasar ko kasi si Kyle sa aking tula - diyos ng kadiliman. Matapos ko banggitin ang linyang iyon, bigla akong natawa. Sobrang pinilit ko na huminto: tumalikod, yinuko ang ulo at kinalabog ang dibdib, subalit wala talaga. Naubos ang isang minuto ko sa katatawa. Memorable.

Natutuwa ako sa ganitong pagsasanay. Hindi kakaiba, at 'di rin kumplikado. Nasa tao na kasi ang paghahanda at pagdadala. Sa bawat kilos, marami ang maihahayag at maabot, at tandaan, sa silid pa lamang iyon.

Ilalathala ko yung piyesa, marka o mga bagay na may ugnay sa bigkas...kapag mahanap ko.

Kung may BIGKAS, may tinatawag na SULAT din.
Ang bigkas may exam: BigXam
Ang sulat may exam: SExam
Ateneo pa rin!

dreams stronger than death

for some time i've waited
something that should have been four
'came by with another half

and to wish for something like winter
in this current condition
would be asking for miracles in the realms of impossibilities

and with the few days that lie ahead,
the things i yearn for may not be granted on a playful day
to wait for a March that never happened

and things didn't seem worse
when i had company and a dream near the window
a dream that has gone far south

and not all things come with honor and recognition
by merely appreciating, we get so much value
and maybe others would too

and I stop dreaming on a hallow October,
for this reasons i remain firm and true
standing UP stronger than ever

and in the moments that i fail
i remember that this is for my dream
a dream that would hopefully return

and nightmares may be there to keep me in disarray
so much similar to the visions that kept me alive
truly alive that kept my eyes closed, bracing for the worst

and by now, the journey does not halt on the 31st
for greater challenges lie ahead
a similar nightmare of another dimension

and i hope to use this for the better times
the times full of purpose and objective
a calling s clear that your own light shines back

and as my dream sleeps
i lay on the ground
as my soul flies up to the clouds of reality and towards the plains of illusion

and end

atat tignan ang orasan